It all started with whipped cream and a devilish grin…
…Sorry to dash your hopes, but this isn’t going where you think. Nope; for a change I’m writing a G-rated post. (Well, okay, I realize how unlikely that is. Maybe PG-13.)
Anyhow, a couple of days ago Hubby and I were eating dinner. I had made crêpes and I was alternating flavours: dousing the first one with maple syrup, then rolling up the next one with whipped cream, sugar, and cinnamon.
I had just finished rolling up a plump crêpe when Hubby looked over at my plate and gave me a devilish grin. “That’s really full of whipped cream,” he observed. “What would happen if I did… THIS!”
And he mimed slamming his hand down on the end of my crêpe.
Imagining my crêpe being transformed into a whipped-cream cannon, I burst out laughing because it brought back great memories of being in the Taché Hall residence at the University of Manitoba a few decades ago.
Taché Hall now houses the Marcel A. Desautels Faculty of Music, but it was originally built in 1911 as dormitories for the Agricultural College. (The College later expanded and became the University of Manitoba. For history and architecture buffs, a fascinating account of Taché’s history is available here.)
It still retained most of its original grandeur by the time I got there in 1982, but we rowdy prairie teenagers failed utterly to respect it. Fortunately it was mostly stone, because it never would have survived otherwise.
That’s where the whipped-cream memory comes in. Or rather, shaving cream. (Or sometimes sheep shit from the agricultural buildings, but that’s another story.)
The room doors had been modernized and the locks were good (unless someone who shall remain nameless managed to purloin a master key… and that’s another ‘nother story). But there was a gap of approximately half an inch under each door.
Some enterprising person (no, not I) devised a nasty and elegantly simple practical joke. The only materials required were a sturdy 8×10 manila envelope and a can of shaving cream (or semi-liquid sheep shit, depending on how nasty you wanted to get).
Once the envelope was filled with the substance of choice, one had only to slide the open end of the envelope under the gap in the victim’s door and then jump on the envelope. The resulting high-velocity splatter would reach nearly every part of the tiny room. Bonus points were awarded if the occupant was present at the time.
Another favourite prank was the shit-shower, in which the prankster lurked in a toilet stall bearing a bucket of ice water mixed with shredded toilet paper. When an unsuspecting victim entered the adjacent cubicle and sat down, the prankster would dump the bucket over the cubicle wall, dousing the victim and escaping before he/she could pull his/her pants up and pursue.
(Note: I swear I never did these things. I was only an innocent bystander.)
It’s amazing how one crêpe can bring back so many happy memories…
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P.S. I’ve finished the next cover update: Tell Me No Spies. Slowly but surely, I’m getting them done…