Another flash fiction challenge. We get one week and up to 1000 words. This one only needed 100.
Here’s our prompt:
All constructive criticism welcomed and appreciated, as always.
That Man
“Mummy, Mummy, look at that man!”
“Shhh, Donny. It’s not polite to point.”
“But, Mummy, look! What’s wrong with him?”
“Shhh. He’s just different, that’s all. Look, here’s your toy.”
“Was he in a ak-sident?”
“No, honey, he was born that way. Look, what does the happy skeleton say? Boo-oo-oo!”
“M-m-mummy, that man… he’s… he’s scary.”
“Shhh, Donny, look, here’s your toy.”
“B-but what’s wrong with his face?”
“That’s called a lower jaw, honey. Some people are born with them. It just takes them longer to change. Don’t worry, he’ll change, too. He’ll be fine. Just like you and me.”
Love it! I’ ve never thought that we’d appear “different” to paranormal characters. 🙂
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Thanks!
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Pingback: May Writing Challenge – Get Twisted | Sonia G Medeiros is Doing the Write Thing
Oooo now I want to know what the kid and his mum look like! Great ending!
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Awesome! I love that both voices are completely distinctive and I adore the twist at the end. Nicely done!
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That was fun – nice job with just 100 words!
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Thanks, Patti!
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“Lower jaw.”
Forehead- meet palm. I thought it was an *obscure* medical term. Well done!
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Okay, first impression is that this is sort of a funny twist. “It’s called a lower jaw…” So are they talking about people who look like, well, us? Therefore we are the strange looking ones? That’s what my mind is interrupting, and I think it’s brilliant! If not, please let me know so I can reread the story and look at it from a different angle.
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You’re right on – that’s exactly where I was going with that. 🙂
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I’m now left with my imagination to wonder how cute sounding little Donny and his Mommy looks like!! Liked the twist in the end!!
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Thank you!
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OK I googled “lower jaw.” Earlier I googled “fish-man,” “merman,” “medical oddities,” and several other queries. I also ran the pic- as is, and then cropped and rotated- through tineye. Nada. I could’ve sworn I’ve seen this image before. Or maybe I’ve seen too many 1950s monster movies.
I like your story. Makes me wonder what I would say to Donny.
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Thanks, CM.
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